The Deleted Scenes
Remember when I had a root canal the night before your birthday? I still surprised you with a party at work and insisted we still go out to that old movie theater near the beach. I spent the whole movie squeezing your hand so hard you had imprints of my hand in yours. I was in tears by the end, as you dialed my doctor from the parking garage. We spent the rest of the night finding a Walgreens pharmacy that was still open.
Or what about that time we wanted nothing more than to see flamingos and drove forty minutes down to the Everglades to that one park and it closed a minute before we got there?
Oh, I know, what about the first time we went clubbing in South Beach and didn't end up driving home until 4AM? We stopped at that art deco Walgreens in North Bay and raided the shelves of anything with sugar in it.
Or what about this past 4th of July when we ended up eating a pizza in the parking lot of a Wings across from Ron Jon's in that small beach town, and that little boy peed on the wheels of the car next to us? We laughed so hard we cried.
Speaking of crying, what about when we barely knew each other and you stopped by my desk at the office before you even lived in the same city as me? I told you that once you moved down, I would not be the one showing you around town. Then I felt so bad for saying it, only meaning that I didn't have to be the one to show you around if there was someone else you preferred...since we worked together and all. I laughed so hard I cried.
Or what about last Easter when we promised my mom we would get up for the sunrise service and then ended up staying up the whole night before binging out on candy and finishing the rest of 'Narcos'? When we woke up in the dark we wanted nothing more than to stay in bed and just tell Mom we went. We tried, but when we went to fall back asleep we felt too guilty and put on ball caps and raced to the beach in our PJs. It was the most beautiful service I have ever attended, as you stood behind me on the weathered pier and the sun rose over the ocean.
What about all of those deleted scenes? What do we do with them now? Just keep them in a suitcase we never open in the back of the guest room closet? Do we burn all of the film and only focus on the scenes that made it into the movies we are living? How do our movies now make sense without those cut scenes?
When you're having a rough day and the world seems to be coming at you with the sharpest knives, I hope you can take out one of those scenes and remember how much joy you felt at one point in your life as you watch it. Know that I watch them every now and then, when I shut the rest of the world out and have a need to remember what it felt like to be loved by you.
And when you are having the worst day and need someone who understands you to film a new scene with, I hope you know I will show up, I will listen, I will play the part you need me to because that what lovers do.
Please call, I will answer.